It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas. In July.
It’s not a matter of rushing the season. The trees are lit and the house is decked year-round at Lois Mann’s Restaurant on the South Side. And as far as restaurant themes go, Christmas seems like a good one. It’s worthy use of the volumes of holiday decor that tend to pile up. Lois Mann’s also has a detectable guitar theme, with instruments also mounted up high as decor elements. But it’s hard to compete with all the Christmas bling, especially the animatronic section.
We’re not talking about shellacked corporate kitsch here. We’re talking real-real, real-deal.
That said, Lois Mann’s menu isn’t particularly Christmasy. No cranberries. Or roast goose. Instead, it’s a straight-up diner that, in the tradition of good diners, serves breakfast all day, along with a line-up that includes everything from a classic grilled cheese to stuffed peppers.
Anyway, it’s a good time. So grab your cash and let’s try some things out.
Grab your cash, literally, by the way. Before you get all carried away with ordering, make sure you’ve packed cash. This is not a credit operation.
Alright, so the protocols might not be clear upon arrival, but go ahead and take a seat at any vinyl-tablecloth covered table. It’ll take a minute to review the manageable menu, illuminated through the magic of Christmas lights. Breakfast all day means pancakes any time, and you can score a platter of three golden rounds for $3.99. Nicely shaped, with crispy edges and plenty absorbent for as much syrup as you need.
Breakfast all day also means regular access to a good combo of homey gravy, well-populated with sausage, a warm biscuit, fried potatoes, and two eggs, fried to order (all-in $6.95).
The breakfast menu extends into a few omlettes and french toast options as well. Beyond the breakfast scene is a classic diner menu, the pinnacle of which is likely the Hot Roast Beef Split ($12.95). It is throwback food. If you need artisanal, hand-carved organic beef on freshly-baked, seeded bread, you need to explore some other restaurant. At Christmas Town, you’re looking at a couple pieces of not-too-processed lean roast beef between slices of white bread, smothered in brown gravy. The same gravy covers a perfectly round scoop of mashed potatoes. Long-cooked green beens are served on the side. It’s not fancy. It is filling and delivers a full-on old school diner experience.
Slightly fancier are the Cabbage Rolls ($12.95). A tidy loaflet of nicely seasoned ground beef (with a little rice) is wrapped inside soft-cooked cabbage that’s smothered and stewed in a tomatoey sauerkraut blend. The combo is cooked long enough to take some of the aggressive zing out of the kraut, but it retains enough personality to give the dish a little zazzle. It too is served with a scoop of potatoes and green beans.
Beyond the diner fare, the menu also features subs and pizza options. Lois Mann’s is closed Sundays, but open Monday through Saturday. According to a sign on the door, current hours are 7 a.m. until 3 p.m. You’ll find it at 1904 S. High St. (But you won’t find it online, the restaurant does not boast a website or social media page.)
All photos by Susan Post
